My brain is always moving quickly–thinking, planning, reminiscing, dreaming, creating and is actively working. It doesn’t shut down much. It has always been like this and it always will. That is a part of who I am.
Sometimes my thoughts are happy and pleasant and other times they are negative, intrusive and alarming. When negative words and ideas start filling my mind, it is easy for me to become those words. I become angry, hateful and self-defeating or whatever the recording is playing inside my mind. Whatever it is I become it.
“Your mind is a garden. Your thoughts are the seeds. You can grow flowers or you can grow weeds.”
For example, before going into work sometimes my brain repeatedly says, “I don’t want to work today. I don’t want to work. I hate working. I hate work. I hate this job. I want to stay home. This job sucks. I hate that I have to work. Hate. Hate. Hate.” I become my words and I begin to hate. Even after reading my comments, didn’t you start to hate my job too? 🙂
The more I flood my mind with angry words the more I become angry and unhappy. This is not how I want to feel and no way to begin my long eight and half hour work day. I will become an ugly reflection of my negative thoughts and will begin to feel the meaning behind those words. It will become more work to hide the negativity inside my mind.
After the negative words seemingly flow from my subconscious and echo inside my mind for a few minutes…
I slam on my thought breaks and screech my negative hateful words to a halt.
That’s it. No more. I must stop this negative thought process. My mom used to say, “Don’t be a negative Nelly.” Go from a negative Nelly to a positive Polly.
Even though I don’t feel happy or positive at the moment, I start repeating positive comments to myself. It can’t hurt. It is better than feeling angry and negative. Plus, it can be a distraction technique. So, I say things like, “I love my job. I am happy to be going to work. I’m a good person. I will share my love with others. I will let Jesus’ love shine through me. I am happy to be alive. I will be a blessing to others. I need to let God’s love shine me and touch others. Please God, let your love shine brightly through me.”
As I walk into the building, I think, “I love my job. I love my job. I love my job. I love my job. I love my job. I love my job. I love my job. I love my job….” I continue to think happy thoughts until I encounter other people. Hopefully, my positiveness will stay inside me and reflect out of me and carry me strongly through my day.
I am super sensitive to EVERYTHING–people’s verbal and non-verbal language shouts at me sometimes. I must learn to not listen to it and brush it off. I cannot let it consume me or become me. This is difficult and is a continuous work in progress. It has helped me so much by getting rid of the negative things in my life and by that I mean people. If people brought me down and interfered with my recovery, I kept them out of my life. It was necessary and beneficial for my continued mental wellness.
“Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.” ~Mark Twain
I realize positive thoughts do not stop depression, but I have learned after years of living a mental illness life that I must keep a positive dialogue playing inside my mind as often as possible. This is a great coping technique that has worked tremendously for me.
Please give it a try. When negative thoughts fill your mind, say something positive over and over and see what happens. It doesn’t make things end like depression and of course it isn’t a cure for what is ailing you but it sure can help improve whatever state your mind is in. Just give it a try. It helps me stay afloat and combat the demons sometimes, and by demons I mean negativity, intrusive thoughts, past abuse, belittling, shame, hurtful labels and any negativity trying to move into your beautiful mind.
Don’t let negativity overstay its welcome. Negative words don’t pay rent and I guarantee there is nothing gained from the negative words or thoughts so kick out negativity before it becomes a tenant inside your mind. Stay free and clear from any unwanted negative guests inside your own mind and also in your life.
Positivity breeds more positiveness
and the birth of peaceful harmonious joy.
© 2019 Susan Walz | myloudwhispersofhope.com | All Rights Reserved
10 thoughts on “Don’t Be a Negative Nelly”
Thanks for the practical advice, Susan! I stay pretty negative, too, so I’ll try your suggestions.
It really helps me when I find myself echoing negativity in my head. Sometimes I don’t even realize I am doing it. I use it the most right before I need to go somewhere. I think I may need to apply this technique more often though. Sometimes I need to repeat positive things many times to distract my negative thoughts. I hope this makes sense. Thanks for reading and your reply. I appreciate YOU. 💗😊🌸🤟
❤ Thanks! Yeah… at an initial point, my counselor said we needed to work on a state of positive thinking (instead of my perpetual insistence on a cloud of negativity).
I understand and can relate. Have a happy rest of your weekend. Cheers to happy thinking (for both of us).
It is hard to break away though. Even forcing the thoughts to be positive can turn mine into negative. Perhaps because my anxiety makes my intrusive thoughts seem justified that it becomes more difficult.
Positivity is definitely a great thing to work towards though. Gotta do a little each day.
Thank you. It is definitely very hard to keep negativity out of our lives. It is a daily battle that becomes easier the more I work on it. I wonder if negativeness is like a bad habit I had for years and bad habits are always hard to break. I am trying to turn it into a positive habit of positiveness… somehow. It is a constant work in progress but it sure helps me. Sometimes I don’t know if I feel or believe the positive words I say but those positive words sure help me to feel better than the negative words. The negative words make me feel worse. Thanks for reading and for your great feedback. One day at at time.
Yeah, looking at negativity as a bad habit may work. Takes time to get over. Someone has said that before too, but I can’t remember who.
It is always a constant work in progress, but you got this!
Thank you. So do you.
This is a great write with good advice. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and advice 🙂