I have spent the last several months going to work and going home. Not much socializing. Sometimes once a month I would go out if invited to something. I was trying to save money. And I was trying to work on myself. I went to counseling and did other activities to pull myself out of depression. I don’t have insurance so that was the best I could do. I remember feeling alone often. I looked for ways to stay busy and distract myself from how I felt. I wished I could afford to go out and spend time with even one person.
As I was getting to a better place with my finances, the pandemic happened. Everything shut down. I lost a lot of work. Other than concerns for my income, my daily routine didn’t change much. I couldn’t read a book at a coffee shop, but I could live without that. I had grown more comfortable with myself and didn’t mind the alone time. I still feel alone but it doesn’t bother me as much. I’ve grown to a place where I enjoy cooking again. I read more. I write fiction more. My creative ideas are never ending.
During the pandemic, there were videos of celebrities feeling upset during social distancing. This reminded me of how I felt. I realized there wasn’t anything wrong with me or how I felt. We were all reacting in a normal way to isolation. I hope people are discovering new things about themselves. If you’re bored during isolation, you need new hobbies. If you’re alone and uncomfortable, you need to love yourself and enjoy your own company. We all should set time aside to be alone. It’s important to our wellbeing. Find your happiness in the alone time.
James Pack is a self-published author of poetry and fiction. Information about his publishing credits can be found on his personal blog TheJamesPack.com. He resides in Tucson, AZ.
understand that not everyone is in a place where they can share their story, but when you are ready you should. I think the best thing I did in 2017, was find my place in my blog where I can write about my life. But beyond that, I never imagined that the therapeutic process of blogging my mental illness life could have so many positives.
OVER THE COURSE OF WRITING my blog I have shared so much of my experiences before and after my diagnosis in 2007. It has been the most therapeutic experience in my life. I never thought I could tell my story. In the past week I have started to begin the process of expanding The Bipolar Writer into sharing other people’s stories.
I understand that not everyone is in a place where they can share their story, but when you are ready you should. I think the best thing I did in 2017, was find my place in my blog where I can write about my life. But beyond that, I never imagined that the therapeutic process of blogging my mental illness life could have so many positives.
The other part of sharing my story, and that is it helps take away the negative stigma that comes with having a mental illness. I used to believe that being Bipolar is a bad thing. But writing my screenplay, my blog, and now my memoir has given me a new perspective on the stigma. I believe through shared stories it changes the narrative.
What I have learned from my fellow bloggers is there are so many likeminded people that want to share their story. We all have our own unique perspective to share within the mental illness community. I can share my story and it may parallel your own, but you have something to add because you went a different route in your mental illness.
I can’t imagine giving up my blog, because I have met so many amazing bloggers along the way that can empathize with my own plight. I think together, we can work towards changing how people who have never been in our shoes look at us. One word at time.