The Delusional Drug

I was experiencing symptoms for roughly two weeks before any of us realised that it might be the drug I was taking that was responsible.

How to Have Kids When You’re Crazy

Awhile back, I advocated in favor of having children when you have a mental illness. Even at the time, I felt wishy-washy in doing so. I may talk the talk and chase after the children I’ve birthed, but I don’t exactly walk the walk. Birthing children and raising them is HARD. Doing so whilst battling Depression… Continue reading How to Have Kids When You’re Crazy

Babbles: Bella’s Big Adventure: The Home Stretch

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I leave for treatment on Thursday.  It seems to have come upon us quickly in that slow agonizing kind of way.  I am the kind of person that once I have my mind made up, I am set and I am ready.  When I have to wait it is pure agony for me. I know… Continue reading Babbles: Bella’s Big Adventure: The Home Stretch

Into Me I See (Pt. 1)

I couldn’t possibly be more unhappy than I am right now. I’m strapped into a long, metal tube with about one hundred strangers approximately 10,000 meters above sea level, flying back to my hometown in rural Australia. In the next row, three shtick heads are hooting, hollering and rough-housing like it’s a Friday night at… Continue reading Into Me I See (Pt. 1)

What Are Friends For?

Do you ever get that feeling that you’re the needy friend in the relationship? I do, quite often I might add. You see, my depression was pretty much taken care of by my ECT treatment. The thing that didn’t go away, or even get better as a matter of fact, is my anxiety. Particularly my… Continue reading What Are Friends For?

Running Towards Hugs.

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I am making moves towards my next goal of moving back home after moving out of state a year ago. I applied and applied for jobs until I finally found something that would suit me. I felt immediate relief in signing the offer letter. I know it was the right choice. It isn’t because I… Continue reading Running Towards Hugs.

Family Estrangement After Childhood Trauma

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My friends from large families never understood why I don’t enjoy family gatherings. I don’t like crowds, even if I know everyone. I don’t see my family often enough to know any of them. This is my extended family, but what about the family I grew up with? I have my parents and two older… Continue reading Family Estrangement After Childhood Trauma

Should You Have Kids If You Have a Mental Illness?

I often wonder if I’ve screwed up my children. Not only do I enact terrible punishments like limited screen time or healthy options before sugar, but I also insist they do homework and get to bed at a reasonable time. Most of all, though, I worry that I literally screwed them up. You know, genetically. I… Continue reading Should You Have Kids If You Have a Mental Illness?

Mopping Up Mental Health

I went to the clinic on Friday.  Quite cheerful I was when I arrived there and ready to get things DID. I shuffled past the HIV and AIDS Section.  The Reproductive Health Section with many blushing teenagers and finally turned the corner at the clinic to head to the mental health “corner”.  I paused briefly… Continue reading Mopping Up Mental Health

That Time I Almost Went to Disneyland

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Growing up, my family never went on any vacations. One year when I was eight, we traveled to Tennessee for a family reunion. I didn’t know anyone on that side of the family and never made friends quickly anyway. I don’t remember any other time we traveled somewhere that didn’t involve moving. We lived in… Continue reading That Time I Almost Went to Disneyland