James’ Patreon Account

Become a Patron!https://c6.patreon.com/becomePatronButton.bundle.js

Patreon is crowdfunding like GoFundme but much different. You become a Patron on me–James Edgar Skye, the writer. It is a monthly subscription based crowdfunding, and it allows you, the Patron, to be a part of my writing process. Depending on your tier you will get a sneak peek at a chapter in my memoir (which is in the editing phase of publishing) or a sneak peek at a chapter in my upcoming fictional novel The Rise of the Nephilim which I am working on, and I am nine chapters into the project. Other things that I offer are special shout-outs and first looks on upcoming blog posts before they hit The Bipolar Writer blog.

Becoming a Patron will allow me to do some great things like self-publish my novella Angel on the Ward and so that I can offer it on specific tiers. It will let me start to create merchandise for my brand The Bipolar Writer, which would be things like t-shirts and coffee cups. Here is my logo if you have not seen it yet.

A Look at J.E. Skye’s Tiers

Become a Patron!https://c6.patreon.com/becomePatronButton.bundle.js

The Bipolar Writer Tier – $2

In this $2 tier, you help the continued success of The Bipolar Writer blog and the brand. You’re also helping a struggling Graduate student and writer, who is living with a mental illness on a daily basis and still finds a way to live. I have been struggling with mental illness since 2007.

You get a personalized letter or email welcoming you as a Patreon, and a “First Look” at weekly blog posts for the Bipolar Writer blog before it goes live! This tier will help keep my blog writing and help me end the stigma surrounding mental illness. This will also be a great tier to allow me to hire an “editor and manager of my blog.”

“The Bipolar Writer Maniacs” Basic Tier – $5

In this $5 tier you help support James Edgar Skye and his writing endeavors as a Bipolar Writer Maniac! You’re also helping a struggling Graduate student and writer, who is living with a mental illness on a daily basis and still finds a way to live. I have been struggling with a mental illness since 2007.

You get everything in the “Support for The Bipolar Writer” tier plus a personalized blog post on any “mental health” subject that you want for your blog, and my monthly newsletter to start every new month!

“Bipolar Writer-Maniacs” Mid Tier – $10

In this $10 tier, you help support James Edgar Skye and his writing endeavors as a Bipolar Writer Maniac! You’re also helping a struggling Graduate student and writer, who is living with Bipolar One daily and still finds a way to live. I have been struggling with mental illness since 2007.

In this mid-level tier, you get everything from the first two tiers plus an exclusive look at a chapter from “The Bipolar Writer: A Memoir before publication.

“Bipolar Writer-Maniacs” 2nd Mid Tier – $15

In this $15 tier, you help support James Edgar Skye and his writing endeavors as a Bipolar Writer Maniac! You’re also helping a struggling Graduate student and writer, who is living with Bipolar One daily and still finds a way to live. I have been struggling with mental illness since 2007.

It also comes with a personal invitation to my exclusive Patreon community.

“The Bipolar Writer-Maniacs” Top Tier $20

In this $20 tier, you help support James Edgar Skye and his writing endeavors as a Bipolar Writer Maniac! You’re also helping a struggling Graduate student and writer, who is living with Bipolar One daily and still finds a way to live. I have been struggling with mental illness since 2007.

In this top tier, you get everything from the previous three tiers plus an exclusive look at my upcoming fantasy fiction novel to include character sketches or a look at the first chapter of the novel “The Rise of the Nephilim” or a peek at “Angel on the Ward.”

“Bipolar Writer-Maniacs” Exclusive Tier – $40

In the limited Edition Tier, it is the ultimate experience for any Bipolar Writer Maniacs! In this elite tier, you get all the benefits of the previous tiers plus a signed copy of my memoir The Bipolar Writer: A Memoir. (With a release date in Early Summer 2019).

That is it. I really hope you will join me, James on my writing journey. I will be evolving these tiers over time, and even if you just join the $2 tier, it will be a significant help. I am going to be doing a lot of mental health advocacy work through my Patreon account. Click on one of the Patron buttons on this post and join me!

Always Keep Fighting

James Edgar Skye

Become a Patron!https://c6.patreon.com/becomePatronButton.bundle.js

A One Year Blog Annivesary

Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there, wondering, fearing, doubting, dreaming dreams no mortal ever dared to dream before. – Edgar Allan Poe

A Letter to The Bipolar Writer – A Year Later

You made it James. The One year anniversary of The Bipolar Writer blog.


One year ago today you started this blog with an idea. You wanted to share the good, the bad, and the amazing part of living a life within having a mental illness.

You had your doubts, this was the third time in four years that you wanted to blog about your experiences. You yearned to finally share The Bipolar Writer and James Edgar Skye with the world, but with the past failure at blogging, it was easy to say “if this fails, I am done writing.”

It was different for you this time, you had taken a class on creating an cultivating a productive blog. You made the decision to do things right. The first thing was to buy a domain name. It meant having access to better themes that could really make your blog a professional one. It was as if the stars had aligned and you finally had your shot a making something great.


It was a risky venture starting this blog in September. In the distance, you knew that there was a chance that being Bipolar could stop this blog in its tracks. With October and November looming you made the decision to move forward. It was the right choice.

There were struggles. In this mental illness life, it is never easy. You had no idea that things would take off the way that it did. It was so easy to just be yourself and begin to share the experiences as both James and The Bipolar Writer.

Amazingly in November, the blog was blooming, and out of it came an idea– The Bipolar Writer Memoir. It was your ten year anniversary that month, and the stars really aligned. Like the idea of blogging, you had tried so many times in the past to write your memoir. Yet with every comment, every like, and every conversation, it became clearer that this is where the rest of my year would go. I wrote like a madman, but it the feedback that made it all possible.

In December you took another significant step, you decided it was time to start writing the stories of others. What has become a series, Interview Features – The Series, you showed the world that mental illness has so many faces. It helped you that people were willing to share their own journey with you, hoping that you would shed some light on their stories. It became the best series. It gave me another idea– contributor writers for The Bipolar Writer blog. December was a fantastic month, and even with a week of depression to end the year, you were ready to take The Bipolar Writer blog into 2018.


2018 was gonna be the year that things finally started to gather yourself and there were so many goals to start the year My 2018 Goals. It was tough at times because your depression and anxiety spiraled out of control for days at a time. Unlike the winter months in the past, you found solace in your writing, and this blog became the connection to sharing your experience with the mental illness community. It was all going well. The blog was shining, and the memoir was coming along– then you hit the worst stretch of this blog which coincided with a severe depression cycle that started early March.

It had to happen. Nothing in this mental illness life is easy. I needed to struggle in 2018. It was a rare occurrence to have long depression cycles. This one started in March and finally let up in May. I could see that my energy was just not into writing new and original content. I was lucky though, I had some of the most fantastic contributor writers that helped this blog continue to move forward. I would have been lost without their willingness to pick up the slack.


It was summer. You graduated. You worked your ass off to reach 100,000 views, and you did it. You amazed yourself. The ups and downs. Through it all, you always found a way to continue to make The Bipolar Writer blog the best ever.

You shared so much with your followers, and you were amazed by the outpour through victories, reaching goals, and the even more fantastic how your fellow mental illness bloggers picked you up when you were down.

This journey has been the best thing to happen to The Bipolar Writer, and you wouldn’t have it any other way. You made it to one year. Here is to many more years of sharing my experience with Bipolar One.

I promise to make it the best ever.

Always Keep Fighting (AKF)

James Edgar Skye

Photo Credit:

Markus Spiske

Samuel Zeller

Carl Raw

Ksenia Makagonova

The History Behind My Screenplay

I wrote this piece in October of last year and I wanted to re-share this post as I work towards getting an agent so that I sell my first screenplay. It’s been on the back burner the last couple of months as I had hoped to place in a screenwriting competition. It didn’t work out but I am determined to sell my screenplay and to finish writing the novel version. As with all things in life patients is the key.

Looking Back on How Memory of Shane Came Into Existence

I thought it was time to talk about my biggest project out there right now, my screenplay entitled Memory of Shane and its subsequent novel that I am writing. This story is really about two years in the making and since I am writing the novel version the idea continues to be ongoing.

The project started as a short story that I wrote for an advanced writing class about two years ago. I never imagined that I would write this story beyond this class because it was a good piece, and there were so many places I wanted to go with it, but the ten-page limit really made me believe that I was done. But, when the opportunity came to choose a story for my second screenwriting class (where our goal was to write the first draft of act one of a full-length screenplay) I jumped at the chance to explore my story again.


Writing the first act was so amazing. I really got to know the story down to its bones, and I knew the developing it into a screenplay would give me the opportunity to refine my dialogue skill to a new level. In my advanced screenplay class, we finished act two and looked toward the future for act three. I knew by the end of my advanced screenwriting class where I would go in the final act, it would be a few more months until I finished my complete first draft, and of course, there was a long editing period.

But where did this story come from? I will admit the story is a work of fiction, but as any writer will tell you, it is impossible for your real life not to make its way onto the page. The basis of Memory of Shane is a love story between Adriana, the young nineteen-year-old not looking for love and Shane the young writer hoping for his big break. What drove me to even start to write a love story was rooted in what happened in my own personal relationship with my girlfriend at the time in 2007.

I will written several blogs about diagnosis the inception of The Bipolar Writer blog. After leaving the psychiatric ward for the first time there was true chaos in my life.

I was on new medication that I didn’t believe in. I had some idea where my life was heading, and so I was worried about the emotional toll that being in a relationship with me would be for my girlfriend. I loved her, and she was willing to stick it out with me, but I did the unthinkable and ended my relationship in a very Bipolar way. She came to my house and I broke up with her. I was a jerk, there is no getting around that now. Looking back, I know my girlfriend would’ve stuck by with me through the extreme ups and downs, but it just wasn’t fair to her because, as I would find out, 2008 and 2009 were the worst years of my life.

What does this have to do with anything? Well, when writing Memory of Shane I had the opportunity to explore if and how two people could coexist when one of the people in the relationship is bipolar. On some level, I wanted to imagine if a person like me could be in a healthy relationship. I worked so many scenarios in my mind that it gave me the ability to write a story that, at some level, could have been my own life. Our past choices are long gone now, but it’s great as a writer to explore your past through your writing.

It is almost impossible for my own life not to sneak into my writing, and in my screenplay my character Shane does reflect my own experiences with Bipolar One. We both fell in love at the start of our diagnosis although Shane tried to hold on to Adriana. Both Shane and I can trace our symptoms to our teen years. I even wrote a scene where Shane spends days laying down in his bed in complete darkness, I did so many times during my long cycles of depression.

Beyond the diagnosis, both Shane and I tried to take our lives three times, thought Shane was unfortunately successful became a statistic. There was a part of me that, when I wrote Shane’s death in the story, that once and for all that any thoughts of suicide in my own life died with this character. I would no longer walk down that dark path that leads to suicide. It became true​ when I made the decision to end my character Shane’s life, I would lock that part of me away that piece of me forever, and then I decided to start a blog and write memoir. Life is funny like that sometimes, and I have talked extensively about suicide on this blog.

After finishing my full-length screenplay of Memory of Shane it came down to if I would write the novel version. I put so much into this project, could I really do it again? It took months before I could revisit the idea again and eventually I gave in. It will be interesting for me to explore this story once again.

So, there is a little history on my project Memory of Shane.

J.E. Skye

Photo Credit:
unsplash-logoJustin Luebke

unsplash-logoJason Yu

My Weekly Wrap-Up 12/18 – 12/24

Well, we have finally arrived the day before the big day, Christmas Eve. For me, it has been a weird up and down rollercoaster. I finished my finals and I am ready for some much-needed rest from school. Rest for me means writing because I find nothing more therapeutic. I am closing in on a real first draft of my memoir The Bipolar Writer, and I hope for it to be completed in my time off becomes a reality.

I always like these weekly wrap-ups because of its an opportunity to look back on what I wrote and what we talked about on this blog. So let’s get started.

A Little White Pill

I opened my week with a poem. A Little White Pill was another poem I wrote about dealing with panic attacks. A common theme over the month of December. It is similar to my poem 12:15 am but it dives deeper into the issue. It was written during a particularly tough panic attack I went through.

What Drives Me

This blog post I talk about the things that drive me daily to continue to achieve my goals. I have so many big things coming in 2018 and the biggest finishing my Bachelor’s degree and completing my memoir. There are other equally important goals like starting my Master’s program and maybe winning the BEA student screenwriting competition. I reached my 2000th follower just before writing this blog post and it felt like another amazing goal for me to reach. It is important for someone like me, who deals with being Bipolar and anxiety daily, to always be moving forward.

Morgan’s Interview Feature

I was excited to write my first interview feature article for The Bipolar Writer on a very special friend of my mine, Morgan. It meant a lot that Morgan was willing to share very personal experiences with me and to allow me to share them with my followers. Every journey with a mental illness is different, and its important to me to share the stories of others. Take a journey from the origins of Morgan’s mental illness to how she turned her issues into the creative process. Morgan’s Interview Feature is a must read.

Learning From Cognitive Behavioral Therapy

I wanted to celebrate my eight months of working with CBT to get my anxiety under control with one of the techniques I have learned during my time. It has been an up and down process but I have learned a lot about how effective CBT can be. In this post, I talk about “Nonjudgemental Focused Emotional Awareness.” The point of this exercise is to see how you do at not judging the thoughts that come through your head while you are focusing on your breathing. In my own experience, it has been helpful to break down my thoughts into a spreadsheet that breaks down each session. It’s great for really breaking down turning negative thoughts that often come racing through my head.

My Bipolar Experience with the ER

In this post, I talk about the first three years of my diagnosis and how the many emergency room visits within the American Healthcare system can be counterproductive for someone with a mental illness. Everyone experiences the emergency room differently but I eventually realized that it is not always the most effective place to go. In the blog post, I share my experiences as an example of what could happen.

Tony’s Interview Feature

Tony’s Interview Feature was the second installment of what is shaping up to be one of the biggest series on the Bipolar Writer. Tony’s story is another look at how a mental illness can affect the course of someone’s life. It is amazing how people are willing to share their story with me, it really means the world. Like all of our stories, Tony’s journey is a unique one, and another story that about turning the worst part of our mental illness into a creative outlet.

Then, There are Nights

In this blog post, I talk about what I am not describing as one of the worst panic attacks since starting this journey. It lasted for hours and almost landed me in the hospital. The post was a short one but I talk a lot about looking at the triggers and look toward the future at getting my anxiety back under control.

My Fourth Honest Post

I love writing these posts because they are all about reflection and looking towards my future. This reflection was one of my favorites because it was after the worse panic attacks of my life. It is amazing how something like a panic attack can really put things into perspective. I really looked towards the future of this post. reflection is good for the soul.

Giving up Coffee

In this post, I talk about a different medical issue in my life dealing with my stomach problems and my issues with ulcers. I had to talk to my stomach doctor again and it seems that I will have to give up coffee, which if you follow my blog, will be a difficult task over the next few months.

That is my week, and to be honest, its been a good one even with the craziness that is my life.

I wanted to end this post by wishing all my fellow bloggers and followers a very Merry Christmas. It has been an honor to have so many great people read about my journey. The best thing I did was start this blog.


J.E. Skye

Photo Credit:


unsplash-logoIgor Ovsyannykov

My Fourth Honest Post

I have had a lot of time to reflect today. After last nights panic attack that almost landed me in the hospital, I spend most of the day in bed, mostly thinking about the causes of my anxiety.

It’s funny. I have been working toward so many goals this year. I started this blog because it was a requirement for a class I was taking. It was creating my writer’s platform. A place to share the parts of myself that were both as a writer and as someone with a mental illness. It has been an amazing journey for me. The people that have touched my life through their own sharing of their own stories.


I have tried to create a blog much like what The Bipolar Writer in the past, it has become over these past few months something I have never imagined. I had no expectations that this place would become a place to really talk about mental illness, not just my own story.

I never thought I would be an advocate. I mean three years ago I thought I was done with writing. Even with working on my degree in creative writing, I always thought I would teach.

I think it was my first writing class that really restarted my love to write. My first short story I wrote early on in my college career turned out to be the difference to who I am as a writer now. It was a short story called Memory of Shane.

It would be sometime before I decided to start to take screenwriting classes. It was really just a reason to hone my craft. I had been writing a lot of short stories, I was working on an unfinished manuscript, I and thought why not try a hand in screenwriting?

In my first screenplay class, I wrote a fifteen-page short screenplay where I learned to write an entire story (three acts) from start to finish in such a short space, and it really helped me as a writer.

I decided to really give screenwriting a chance and in my next two classes, I wrote the first two acts of what became my screenplay Memory of Shane. It was the first time in my life that major parts of my life story became the inspiration to write about mental illnesses. But the story in Memory of Shane, while mirrors parts of my life, it was a fictional story.

I came up with an idea. I could really share my own story, but I was worried. My story out there in the world under my real name, it scared me to death. It was one of the reasons why when writing the third act of my screenplay that I started to design what became my pseudonym, James Edgar Skye.

When I finally finished my screenplay and editing it all this year it was time to move on. I wanted to do two things. Launch my writing career and find a place where I would feel safe writing my story so that I can write my memoir, something that I wanted to do for so many years.

The Bipolar Writer is my place to share my story. It’s been amazing how so many people have touched my life by sharing their own stories on my blog. It even gave me the inspiration to share the stories of others in feature articles. The feature articles on Morgan and Tony are just the beginning of what an I hope to be a long series.

My last thoughts today are about my memoir. It has been coming along great and I am close to a first draft. It worries me. I have shared so much on the blog and there is still more to my story. I think that’s what was worrying me last night.

The future. It’s always scared me.

Four years ago I never thought that I would be close to getting my bachelors degree.

Seven years ago I was laying in the hospital wanting to change, and here I am, doing the thing I love, writing.

It’s amazing where I have been. Last night wasn’t a step back. I won’t let it. I suffer from panic attacks and it’s a part who I am, and I am working so hard on telling my story.

So as we near closer to the end of the year I want to say that to every person who has following my blog, thank you. It is that support of everyone on my blog that has become the reason why I continue to write. I feel as if The Bipolar Writer and those who follow me are a part of my life.

I will be writing a lot over the next few weeks. In coffee shops no doubt, and I really feel like my entire story is ready to be told.


Always Keep Fighting.

J.E. Skye

Photo Credit:

unsplash-logoClark Tibbs

unsplash-logoErnanette Carolino

unsplash-logoBRUNO CERVERA

Weekly Wrap-up 12/4 – 12/10

My original plan was to spend my day editing and forgo my weekly wrap-up, but when I woke this morning I felt good and the need to write was there for me. What I love about writing my weekly wrap-up is it gives me a chance to close out my week and talk recap of the issues that were discussed.

So, here is the review of my week.

Cutting and Self-harm, My Story

The first blog post of the week was a reblogged piece I wrote in September but a more extensive and edited piece. Self-harm was a big part of my life as a teenager and young adult, and I felt it was important to share my own experience with the topic. These types of subjects are hard to understand if you have never had to deal with self-harm, so my aim was to tell my own story so that people can relate or at some level understand why someone would choose to self-harm.

Car Anxiety

In this blog piece, I explore a part of my social anxiety that has become a major part of my daily routine, my driving anxiety (which I really love to call “car anxiety.”) What was good about a piece like this one is that car anxiety encompasses both driving and being a passenger in a moving vehicle. It was great to get feedback on a piece like this and I made the decision to add this subject to my memoir. I am not sure if it will make the final cut but it was fun to write.

Going Through the Motions of Life

Going through the motions of life. With a mental illness as a part of your life, it is not uncommon to have this feeling. We have all, for the sake of sanity, made the decision to go through the motions of a daily schedule without actually being there mentally. This blog piece talks about how you can still be productive despite going through the motions of life.

Finding Happiness With a Mental Illness

Can you find happiness with a mental illness? I am still on the fence that I could share my life with someone who has never spent a day in my shoes. The chaos of life is bad enough but to share my mental illness with someone is an idea that I may never be comfortable with, still, in this blog post I explore my thoughts on the subject of finding happiness with a mental illness.

My Mother Saved My Life

Without my mother, there would be no James Edgar Skye or The Bipolar Writer. In this blog post, I talk about the one person who has always been there in my ten years of ups and downs that have come with my diagnosis. This piece is small because in my memoir I devoted two different chapters about how my mother saved me from myself. This was a good piece to write as we near the end of 2017. I wouldn’t have the courage to write my blog if my mother would have given up on me.

My Experience with the American Healthcare System

What can I say, my experience with the American Healthcare System hasn’t always been great. Over the course of my diagnosis I have racked up way too much medical expense debt and over the years my family has had issues being able to afford my medications. I talk about how having a “pre-existing condition” worked against me, and how finally having the ability to have insurance is no guarantee that I will be able to keep it. I really liked the response from other bloggers from other countries around the world because it shows just how messed up the American system is compared to the world.

Why the Mental Illness Community Should Share Their Story

In the coming weeks, I will feature the stories of other fellow bloggers on my blog The Bipolar Writer. Sharing my own story has changed my life and it has helped me analyze the many aspects of my illness. In this blog post, I make a simple case why sharing your story is helpful to the mental illness community.

Other Blog Posts

I talk about entering my screenplay into a competition here.

I also reblogged a couple of older posts…

A Look How Suicide Effects Families

Winter Speaks Memories

So that is my week in review. Thank you taking the time to read about my journey every week. The positive comments I get each week (and even the few negative ones) make writing this blog worth every second.

J.E. Skye

Photo Credit: unsplash-logoAnnie Spratt

Big News on my Screenplay Memory of Shane


I am really excited that I have officially entered my screenplay entitled Memory of Shane in the…

Broadcast Education Association’s Festival for Media Arts student scriptwriting competition.


Wow, that was long.

I am entering the SW2 – Feature Writing 90-120 pages

I am so excited about the exposure my screenplay will have with this competition. I was able to secure the necessary SNHU faculty member sponsorship and it is a huge step for me.

Wish me luck as I continue my writing journey.

Always Keep Fighting.

J.E. Skye

Photo Credit:unsplash-logorawpixel.com

Photo Credit: http://beaweb.org

How Did I Get Here?

10 years. It still hasn’t sunk in.

To the start of another ten-year journey.

Today marks my official anniversary date of my first time attempting suicide. It feels so surreal. My journey over the past ten years was the lowest darkest lows and some of the strangest highs. I have tested the limits of who I am as an individual and a human being.

I have loved.
I have lost.

I have fought a great war, and while I have lost many battles along the way, I can say it feels great to just be alive. Sure, it isn’t always fun being in my own skin. Just today my so anxiety is at high levels, but I combat these feelings by leaving my comfort zone and writing in my favorite coffee spot.

I wish those of you who follow my blog could have been with me on the entire journey of the last ten years, but I making up the lost time with my blog and my memoir. I feel really sentimental in this moment. I say this all the time, but I really never thought that I would ever reach such a huge milestone in my life.

This is it. The beginning of a new chapter in my life. In this moment I have found the understanding that there was always something at work in my life, and it is why no matter how hard I tried, I was meant to be here. As I continue to reflect on the past ten years it will be to understand enough of the past to make my memoir something great.

“The Bipolar Writer” was born out of the need to be “James the Writer” and the fact that “my diagnosis will always be a part of me.” I decided today to cherish every day for the next ten years because at the end of this new journey I will be a better person.

Thank you for every follower of my blog that brightens up my every day with comments, praises, and their stories. It means the world to me.

Always keep fighting.

James Edgar Skye

Photo Credit: Aneta Ivanova

Excerpt From “Memory of Shane” Act 2

In an effort to share my writing and get feedback I wanted to share some scenes from my screenplay entitled Memory of Shane.” The following is from two scenes at the start of Act 2 because it shows two specific things in the screenplay. First, the back and forth between the present when Adriana arrives in California to find Shane in a coma, and the past when Shane is first diagnosed. I wrote my screenplay on Final Draft so I kept the format. If you want to know more about the history of this piece you can find it on my blog


Adriana stands outside the entrance of a small hospital as PEOPLE walk past her. She has a large coffee in her hand. For a moment, she hesitates just outside the door and then proceeds inside.



Adriana walks up to a counter and sets her coffee cup down. A young RECEPTIONIST sits behind a desk, her eyes locked on her cell phone, a moment passes before she looks up.


Hi. How can I help you today?


I’m here to see Shane Camp.


One moment, please.

The receptionist with her finger finds Shane’s name.


Shane is in room 211. The intensive care unit. You will need this.

The receptionist hands Adriana a guess pass sticker. She puts the sticker on her shirt.


Visiting hours are until seven today.

Adriana turns and walks down a long hallway to an elevator at the end and presses the button to go up.


Adriana firmly presses the number two on the elevator panel and the elevator hums to life moving up.


On the intensive care unit, Adriana casually glances at the numbers on the room doors until she finds room 211 and goes in.


Adriana stands motionless in the entrance of Shane’s hospital room with her hand on the door. Her eyes survey’s the room as Shane lays lifeless in a hospital bed with tubes and wires coming from his body. She stops after seeing this. Fighting back tears she starts to retreat backward running into a nurse who keeps the door from hitting Adriana.


I’m sorry dear, are you okay?


I’m… I’m fine. How is he?


Are you family?


Not exactly.


I can’t give you that information but you can go in if you like.

Adriana grabs the door with a shaky hand and enters the room sitting in a chair next to Shane. She puts her a cup of coffee on a small table next to Shane’s bed. She then puts her hand in Shane’s.


I never thought in a million years I’d be in a hospital with you again Shane.


Shane sits at a round table with chairs encircled around him. His quick glances around the room keep him from making eye contact with the other PATIENTS and VISITORS around him in various stages of activity. His face is a pale white. His eyes lock on an OLDER MAN at the next table quietly in conversation with himself. He is in a T-shirt, hospital pants, and hospital socks. A nurse comes into view breaking his nervous glancing.



Shane, you have a visitor this morning. Are you up for it?


Sure. I guess. Who is it?


It’s your girlfriend.

Shane rubs his right hand over his heavily bandaged left wrist.


Send her in.

The nurse makes her way to a locked door that opens to a small lobby. The nurse faintly calls a name, after a moment Adriana comes into view carrying two coffee cups. Shane looks down at his feet as she makes her way to the table and sits down.


Hi Shane. I wasn’t sure if they would let me but I brought you some coffee.

Adriana slides the cup across the table.


Thanks. The coffee in here sucks, with everything else.

Shane takes the coffee cup taking a long a drink. Adriana’s eyes move from Shane’s face to his bandaged wrists and then quickly back.


Shouldn’t you be in New York?


I came as soon as Mark could get me on the phone. What happened?

Shane again looks down at his feet.


I let the darkness take over. My thoughts consumed me. I couldn’t stop them. It became too much.


I didn’t know you were getting worse. I shouldn’t have left…


This isn’t your fault Adri. I should’ve never gotten involved with you. I let my emotions get the better of me–

Adriana reaches out and grabs Shane by the hand.


–Shane. I’m not going anywhere.

Shane slowly pulls his hand out of Adriana’s.


If you were smart, you’d walk away. I’m damaged goods Adri. I can’t be helped.

After a moment of silence, Shane rises quickly to his feet pushing the chair back and walks away. Adriana has a look of exasperation, with defeat she begins to weep.



Photo Credit: Trent Erwin

My Weekly Wrap up 10/23 – 10-29

This week was shorter since I made the decision to only write four blog posts this week. Unlike other weeks since this blogs inception, my posts have been getting longer and more into what will go into my memoir “The Bipolar Writer.”

To all my followers that have given me amazing feedback on my blog I thank-you, it has really given me the confidence in who I am as a writer. I think in the coming weeks I will consider asking people to share their own stories with me. I had a great idea for a book, a compilation of others like me with mental illnesses and their stories. I wouldn’t mind feedback on this and if you think it could be a reality. This project would be separate from my memoir, but if anyone is interested I will link my personal email at the end of this post.

What did we discuss this week?

` To me, the biggest post was my thoughts on a very important subject in my own life—suicide. It was perhaps one of the hardest posts to write, I have written one other post about suicide but from the position of how suicide affects families, so I took my time when writing this suicide piece. I shared my own experiences and then shared my thoughts on the subject. The piece that I wrote this week is going into my memoir, and I will further expand on it. I don’t normally free write a blog like I did (I usually outline it first) but it seemed worked out and I have gotten good feedback. If you haven’t read the piece, please do it really is a personal piece.

My Second Honest post was just me expressing my thoughts about things that were bothering me in the past few weeks, and especially about my friend who to this minute has not even contacted me to tell me she is alright. I have to ask her brother. All the feedback that I got is pushing me to just let it go for now, and it is what I decided to do. Hopefully one day I can repair the damage. I also touched somewhat on my depression cycles and breaking down when I last saw my therapist. It’s a good piece because it shows that even though things are going great in my life, my depression—mygreatestt companion—will always be there, but at least I know I can fight it.

One of the more interesting posts this week came in How the Change of Season Affects my Depression because this post was all about timing as we move from fall to winter months. My diagnosis of Bipolar One has always had a seasonal component because my depression is at its worse time of year, but I also talk about Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD). I can trace some of the worst times to the period of November to at times to April and March. I tried to commit suicide for the first time Thanksgiving weekend 2007 and New Years 2008. One thing that developed this week was that for the first time since identifying that I am once again in a depression cycle that I stayed in bed yesterday way past when I woke up. I had been trying to make it habit to get out of bed right away like today. I will have to monitor this because it gets easier the more I stay in bed, and before long it will be every day.

If you haven’t read my blog post Sleep Hygiene – Top Ten Tips you really should.

What to expect in the coming weeks?

I have a huge list of topics to write about this week so it is possible that some subjects are going to be left for blog posts beyond this week. I am starting a new semester (I am almost done with my BA in creative writing with a specialization in fiction) so I may write 4-5 posts this week. I want to start posting some scenes from my screenplay Memory of Shane to get feedback. I think this week will be a great mixture of scenes and subjects like my experiences with medicine or more CBT information. I know I will be working on my social anxiety with my therapist so I can share my thoughts before and after. I will write as much as possible, as I also plan on writing at least five first draft chapters in my memoir this week.

J.E. Skye


Photo Credit: ​Thought Catalog