When I see Others With Their Mother

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This is a hard one to write because jealousy is just an emotion that we have, and there is no right or wrong answer if I am honest. It hurts me to see others with their moms out in the world. I was eating ice cream the other day, and I got to see a little human being with their mom. It still hurt. I know this shall pass within my grieving process, it always does as I have read grieving books a lot lately, and even the people I was with were mother and daughter. Losing my mother and it coming on December 15th anniversary, or girefversary (I believe that is right) as Shelby Forsythia explains, the day I lost my own, it can be hard to sit see others close to their mothers.

Interview with Kasey Claborn, Ph.D. – The Bipolar Writer Podcast

Episode Details I always want the community with mental health/mental illness community and those on the front lines trying to change the way mental health and mental illness are treated here in America. Today, I am honored to introduce you to The Bipolar Writer Podcast Kasey Clabron Ph.D., a research scientist and clinical psychologist. This is her episode. About Casey Claborn Kasey Claborn, Ph.D., is a research scientist and licensed clinical psychologist. She is an assistant professor in the Department of Psychiatry at Dell Medical School. Dr. Claborn received her doctorate in clinical psychology from Oklahoma State University and completed her internship at the University of Florida Health Sciences Center. She completed her postdoctoral fellowship at Brown University’s Center for Alcohol and Addiction Studies, where she crossed-trained in HIV and addictive behaviors at the Alcohol Research Center on HIV. Prior to joining Dell Medical School, Claborn served as an assistant professor in psychiatry and human behavior at Brown University. Dr. Claborn conducts research in the field of addictions and develops programs designed to improve access and delivery of substance use treatments. Dr. Claborn is licensed to practice psychology in Texas and Rhode Island. She is a member of PsyPact, which allows her to practice telehealth across state lines.  Where to Find James If you are looking for all things James Edgar Skye, you can find his social media visiting https://linqapp.com/james_skye The Bipolar Writer Podcast is listener-supported, and for as little as $5 a month, you can help support the mental health advocacy that I do by visiting http://www.buymeacoffee.com/jamesedgarskye. Please help this podcast grow by sharing with friends or anyone that you think will benefit from the experiences of others and myself. You can also find me on the following websites. You can also find me on the following websites to book your interview, ask questions, and reach out to me. http://www.jamesedgarskye.me Purchase my books at: https://www.jamesedgarskye.me/jamesedgarskyebooks — This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app — Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/jamesedgarskye22/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/jamesedgarskye22/support

1. Interview with Kasey Claborn, Ph.D. 43:08
2. The Bipolar Writer Podcast: What's Going On? Why I've Been Missing 32:22
3. The Energy Leadership Index (ELI) Assessment 25:38
4. The Bipolar Writer Podcast Interview with Alaina 55:13
5. The Bipolar Writer Podcast Interview with Colleen 01:14:33

It never felt envious of the mother and child. Just knowing that I see it and feeling the feels, it is very new. For a long time, I was hiding my feelings away and not dealing with the realities of life after a significant loss. I allowed the pain to get to a point where suicide was a real option back in October, and I am not afraid of that anymore. I know I always say it, but life coaching and the grief books that I have read helped me, but I still struggle to let go of those final pieces and allow my mom to be in my heart and in the grieving space I have created in my life.

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The upside is that I am healing my heart and not staying so much in my head. I made a pact to work on the inner I each day. That allows me to stay in the now even when depression or anxiety takes over. Depression did on Sunday, but I was always okay. I will be discussing the first anniversary of my mother’s stroke on December 6th, 2019, in detail on the next podcast episode. That day taught me a lot, and when I stayed in the moments and felt what I was supposed to feel, it changed a lot for me, and while there will be situations between now and the 15th, I feel more prepared to allow myself into each day and find a silver lining no matter how small.

It is time for this raven to spread his wings. I have been struggling to not see my Dad as a human being and something I need to protect because he is my father. I never want to lose him as well, but he is not mine to lose. No one is anyone’s to lose, and I am learning to detach from that idea that it comes to be to protect him because of a promise I made to my mom. He is an adult, and no change in him that comes from me will work, and so it is something that I am learning with my parents. Let go of the binding strings and just be who I am meant to be. I need to allow my father to grieve in his own way.

For the first time in 2020, I can see a bright future without the worry of what is next. Things will be okay, and I can stop being addicted to worries, thoughts, pressures, and problems. We have been addicted to these things at some point, and I am one of the many. I have thought about them for fleeting moments today. I need to live for me, and that is what was holding me back. I am ready for anything that comes my way. It hard to see others with their mothers, but that is okay because it also makes me smile that I had the time with my own mother that the universe allowed.

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