Something came to mind as I began to write this blog post. Practice makes perfect. That for those who don’t know is a song from Cute is What We Aim For, a blast to my more emo days. It came up as I began making video content, something I am not totally comfortable with yet, but I am working on the goal!
I have realized that I have really gone inside myself to hide since my loss—the loss of my mother. I was always antisocial and an introvert, but I was still going out and doing things. With my loss and COVID-19, I have disconnected from most of the world. I don’t even write here as often as I want because there has been a real feeling of disconnect. As I am learning by giving myself permission to grieve (Shelby Forsythia), this has been one of my new identities that were once something I clung to–not connecting to the world. Even if it is just with writing.
I am relearning everything. How to live with loss and not hide from it as I have been for close to eight months. In fact, this post happens to land on what would have been my mom’s birthday. I realize that my life has been all about planning, but the actual doing is not something that I am fully committed to, especially when it comes to staying in the present. I recently got fantastic equipment to do video blogs and connect with clients, but it is still a struggle.
So, I thought why not take a chance? I want to meet the amazing people that follow my blog! I know not everyone is ready. I get it, but one or two people that want to connect I am always open. If you want to meet a fellow mental illness traveler, let us connect over Zoom, which is the great equalizer in these different times. I want to meet people so lets connect!
Always Keep Fighting
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