Total Exhaustion

Tonight I am up again late thinking about being in a state of total exhaustion. For a long time, I have said that your mental, physical, and spiritual states are all connected. (This applies to you no matter what religion you have I believe because your spirit or fire that drives you can be your spiritual side as well.) When one of those is stressed due to sickness, exhaustion, over-scheduling, or something that keeps them from being able to find rest at some point the other two will step in place and keep you stable for a little while.

But it adds extra pressure to those other two states as well in the process trying to support you in the area that you need help and handle their own tasks. Before you know it you are in crisis mode in all three areas.

Currently, that is where I am. I’ve been physically sick and battling strep since September. In the beginning, my mental status was on track for the most part and my spiritual status was as well.

Now we are pushing on 5 months of battling strep. That’s 5 months of the other two parts of my health trying to support me and keep me stable while running a fever every day for the past two weeks, getting limited amounts of sleep, and trying to continue working and my daily tasks.

I started seeing slips or changes in my mental health toward the end of November. By the beginning of January, I noticed the need for more medication to help with panic attacks. I am struggling to deal with depression mostly and some mixed states of bipolar. My doctors have suggested increases in medications. I’ve resisted to this point because I feel that the truth is if we can fix the physical part I can regain control of where I need to be.

I’ve really tried to stay on track in boosting my physical health and used tools in my coping techniques to help with my mental health conditions. I’ve tried to lean on my faith and pull my support system closer to me.

The good news is that I have a surgery scheduled for the 12th of this month. I’m hoping this will fix the physical issue and things will work better. I just wanted to give you something to think about.

When you are trying to deal with mental health you also have to take into consideration that stresses to your physical and spiritual health also affect your mental status. They may be big changes that hit suddenly are too much for them to compensate for at once (deaths, loss of jobs, etc) or they may be smaller (lingering illnesses, unresolved issues, over-scheduling yourself, etc). Be mindful of this and be kind to yourself.

26 thoughts on “Total Exhaustion

  1. I took the day off work today for this very thing! Sometimes you have to let go of the guilt you might feel around not pleasing everyone, and look after yourself. Great post.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Yes, it’s so important to be kind to yourself. I had surgery recently too and it’s true that physical state dramatically effects your mental health and vise versa. I had to deal with the stress of healing and getting back to work and eventually I had to stop and remember to be kind to myself. At the time my anxiety was debilitating. But realizing that stress was a big trigger for me help alot. Now I for Us on reducing stress in my life and thing are getting better.

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  3. I, too suffer from severe clinical depression and SAD. There are times of the year when I will increase medications, then decrease once I feel stable, to my normal dose. That usually does the trick. I believe that we have depression ‘flares’… they may last a day, days or a few months when our mood goes awry and our thoughts become irrational but seem so rational. The fatigue and the sadness… everything we battle, including anxiety is full on! But it is temporary, flares are a temporary increase in symptoms. However, how you decide to deal with this is completely your choice! You know you best! ~Kim

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  4. While resisting more medication (which I am in favor for if that’s appropriate.) Please make sure you implement the loss with something else. Light stretching will help a lot when you are sick like this, it keeps your body limber and releases stress. Or perhaps a short walk , even to get your mail perhaps? Small changes can have big effects. Wishing you well.

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  5. Pingback: My Weekly Wrap-up of the Bipolar Writer Blog – The Bipolar Writer

  6. I’m so sorry you’re dealing with so many health issues. I have family members that deal with the same problems and dealing with physicians and medication makes it even harder. I have hope that in God’s Kingdom illness will be a thing of the past (Revelation 21:3,4). I pray that the God of all comfort (2 Corinthians 1:3,4) provides you with the strength you need to continue to endure. I hope your procedure makes things better.


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