Car Anxiety

/ James Edgar Skye

Car anxiety or driving anxiety?

I know it sounds weird. Trust me it’s weird to say it let alone deal with it every time I get into my car. I am an excellent driver. No brag, and I love driving.

Well at least until about three years ago I loved driving. Now it’s a constant reminder that I am anxious behind the wheel. I live in fear of the worst case scenario, what could happen if I have a panic attack on the road. It’s one of the reasons I don’t leave my house much, and when I do I always take extra Ativan with me.

My anxiety & social anxiety is always an issue. When I leave my house I am 9/10 already dealing with anxiety. The worst is when the anxiety is intensified. I feel outside my body and very panicky.

I used to be able to drive anywhere and one of my places of solace was behind the wheel. I could be at total peace with the road in front of me driving for hours on end.

But that changed, I am guessing about three years ago. I don’t know why I love driving. Traveling in my car was something I could do without question. Just being behind the wheel made me feel alive. I would drive for hours just because I could.

Give me some good music, the open road and I could drive for days.

Looking back I think it started after my last suicide attempt in 2010. I have chronicled the fact that after this suicide attempt I had really bad seizures and I was told I could no longer drive a car for at least a year.

It was close to three years before I even sat behind the wheel again. When I started driving again it was over time that I started leaving my house again. Then my social anxiety makes the decision to worsen after my psychiatrist decided to lower my Ativan dosage.

Then last year I signed up to drive for Uber. I got a car and everything, and then a few weeks in I had a panic attack with a customer in the car with me. It wasn’t a super bad one but it scared me. I never thought I could have a panic attack while driving.

Since then it has happened a few times to a point where I would have to pull my car over just to get back into control. Other times I would be down the road my house only to turn around again and have to go back.

I fear driving now because it is always possible that my anxiety could trigger a panic attack especially now when my anxiety being at high levels.

This time of the year is so tough to work through because I have so much going on. At the same time, my anxiety and depression are playing tug-of-war with my soul.

It’s just another thing I am noticing as I continue to write about my life. Driving used to be a place of solace in my life, but now it’s just another place I don’t feel safe with my anxiety.

What sucks about my driving anxiety is that I have so many plans for 2018. I am going to Vegas after I graduate, I am going to my brother’s wedding, and I might even decide to go and walk with my class for graduation. I have so much to do, and not being able to leave my house will be my biggest fear moving forward.

I am curious. Do any of my fellow bloggers deal with driving anxiety? What do you do to combat it?

Always Keep Fighting.

J.E. Skye

Photo Credit: Mark Cruz

112 thoughts on “Car Anxiety”

  1. I have driving anxity when anyone except me is in the drivers seat. In my head I spend the whole ride screaming slow down, don’t look at your phone, you suck and eating and driving so please don’t. I’m going to puke! If you take a corner like that we are going to crash and die!!! I feel much more at ease when I am driving myself. But I was reminded that even I am not the safest driver but trusted. I have a friend who has so much driving anxiety she refuses to get her license and will have a panic attack if you do anything ‘extra’ while driving. It was a good reminder that it’s important to focus completely while driving weather or not someone else is in the car with me. I have had fear from time to time because of my physical health. I was passing out for a while regularly because of my diabetes. During that time I refused to let myself drive. Now I make sure that I always have snack in my car for my blood sugar. That I turn my phone to do not disturb so I am not tempted to look at it, and always put on peaceful music, unless I am trying to find a new location then no music because for some reason sounds keep me from properly following directions. lol

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  2. I am learning deliverance ministry. I knew nothing of it until God enlightened me this weekend whilst sick with a cold. I am not an expert by ANY MEANS, and the glory GOES TO GOD AND JESUS. I believe you may have picked up a demon before or during your suicide attempt. Please consider going to a reliable pastor and Godspeed!!!!!

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  3. Like @letstalkdepression I get driving anxiety when I am the passenger, but like you mentioned, I love driving too. I don’t know if this makes my anxiety in the car with another driver worse because I am more aware of what’s going on (plus as someone with dyspraxia I pick up on so much visual and audio input), but what I usually try to do, as passenger, is pretend I’m not there. I also suffer from travel sickness so it’s a good excuse to go to sleep during journeys, or put in some headphones with good music and imagine myself away somewhere else.

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      • I hear you, car travel can be tricky. My car sleeps was something I forced myself to do during long journeys when I was a kid, but it won’t work for everyone I can totally appreciate that. Hope you find something which works for you to help make car anxiety easier!

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  5. I have horrible anxiety driving too, especially more than a few minutes from home. Going on the interstate is out of the question nowadays. I couldn’t deal with that at all. Even being a passenger on the interstate wigs me out.

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  6. I deal with it big time, on and off for at least the last 7 years. I wrote a post about it a while back. I haven’t driven in over a year and rely on my husband to drive me to some appointments, which I don’t like. I want to be able to drive myself places again. It’s bad enough to have to leave the house, though, because of anxiety. But I’m taking small steps and walking the dog and to nearby appointments. But the thought of driving to my appointments that are farther away is terrifying.

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    • You didn’t say if you take medicine for your anxiety. If you don’t, you should definitely look at options(at least with your GP). My driving anxiety was at its height around 4 years ago, trying to talk myself through an attack was unlikely without turning into the nearest lot to calm myself. Within a few weeks of starting meds given to me by my GP, I could comfortably drive again 99% of the time on an almost daily, 60 mile commute.

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  8. I deal with this too, unfortunately. Usually when I have someone I’m comfortable with in the car with me I’m okay no matter where we are going. But when I’m driving by myself I feel very limited. I don’t understand why this is happening for me, because I didn’t have anything traumatic happen to me while driving. I used to love driving, it was relaxing for me. Now any drive that’s longer than maybe 10-15 minutes freaks me out. Expressways are totally out of the picture for me. But if I do feel a panic attack coming one, I try and slow my breathing down. Inhaling through the nose, exhaling through the mouth. I also always remind myself I can pull over if I really need to. Some days are worse than others. I realize when I’m really tired, or have had some type of caffeine that makes it worse for me.

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    • Thank you for sharing this, it means a lot to know that I am not alone in this. It was the same for me, I have no idea the cause of my car anxiety. It was as if it was just there one day. It sucks some days because I’d love to just drive to the beach but I have to limit how much I actually drive. It’s usually short trips like to my favorite coffee shop or to an appointment. I feel trapped not being able to drive more than that right now.

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      • I understand, I don’t like the trapped feeling either, it makes me feel worse than I already do. I noticed it comes with an advantage though, because since I don’t like going too far on my own, that gives me a reason to ask a friend or family member to go with me. That way I get to do something I like and I get to spend some time with a friend/family member. It makes me feel better & less isolated.

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  9. I’ve had driving anxiety for at least 10 years now. When I first got my license and wheels, I was jumping for joy and SO excited. Driving equaled freedom. No longer having to depend on my parents to go anywhere. Windows down, music up…..it was awesome! I had anxiety when I was younger related to other things. It would get to the point where if I allowed myself to become overwhelmed internally, I would physically pass out. My brain shuts my body down and says, “nope, we’re not doing this, let’s re-set.” It is quite possibly one of the scariest experiences a person can go through. Now that I’m older, I can feel the symptoms of a panic attack rising, and am more aware of the signals my body gives off. I haven’t fainted in a very long time. One day, I had a random panic attack while driving. My thoughts started to race, imagining every worse case scenario of what could happen to me while driving. Once that chain of thoughts begins…it is extremely difficult to stop. Plus, the fact that I KNOW for a fact that I will pass out if it gets bad…only adds fuel to my anxiety fire. So. I avoid highways/interstates like the plague. If there is a back way, I will always take that route. If not, I try and find a ride. Last resort, I too always travel with meds…just in case. Just knowing I have it makes me feel better. What I have never done, and never will do though – is let the anxiety win, and stop me from what I want to do. I’ve gotta live my life. Good luck to you, I fully understand and relate to how difficult it can be.

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    • I can’t agree more, we can’t let anxiety win. That is one of my goals for this year and into the New Year. Make time to finally get my anxiety under control. Thank you for sharing a small piece of your life with me and my blog. It means the world to know I am not alone in this.

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  10. I don’t often get anxious while driving but I do worry I’m a bit of a menace on the road sometimes. When my thinking is really foggy I find driving to be very overstimulating, so I have to consciously make myself sit back and let my brain’s autopilot take over. Autopilot is often more effective for me than conscious depressed brain, scary as that may sound.

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  11. I didn’t get my license until I was in my 30’s because of it. I still don’t like driving on the freeway/in traffic but luckily where I live now I don’t have to much.

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    • I live in A rural area outside a small city in California, so I have to drive to get everywhere. I actually was supposed to get my license at 16 like most people but when I was 15 I was in a major accident (not driving) so it was a while after that I felt comfortable to get my license. But for so long I loved driving.

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  13. I also have driving anxiety. I was in a car accident about 3 years ago and now I hate driving. I refuse to drive and I can have a panic attack at any moment when I’m in the car. It got to a point

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  14. YES YES YES! I was terrified to learn to drive when I was sixteen and didn’t get my license until I was nineteen. I am now thirty-two and STILL cannot drive on the Interstate. There is a short (approximately 1 mile stretch) that I take to get from the suburbs to the city of Pittsburgh but that’s as far as I’ll go. My husband does all the Interstate driving anywhere else. That’s embarrassing but true. I have had such bad panic attacks driving on highways that I can’t see through my tears and can’t concentrate to focus. All I can think to do is slam on the brakes and pull over. It’s terrible. And terrifying.
    Driving in residential/suburban areas is much better than it used to be, but if I’m late or having a really bad day and get lost, all I can do is pull over and cry. I hate it! I’ve actually missed appointments and avoided going to places (like writing events) because of this. Ugh.

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  15. At times. Mine seems to be higher with I have certain passengers with me. They make me anxious. I used to drive more. It was a huge part of my job and it didn’t matter to where. I don’t know how you feel about this, but I pray as soon as I turn my switch until my anxiety is under control. (Sometimes it’s a while, others not) If my anxiety heights I pray for help again. I also listen to certain stations on the radio or a calming CD. It’s a struggle at times, and “city” driving is the worst for me. But it’s better than it was.

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  16. Wonderful post. I’ve been living in NYC for a year, so I rarely ever drive anymore. However, when I was living in Connecticut, I was constantly petrified of getting in a car- be it behind the wheel or as a passenger. It stems from the 2 car accidents I have been in, both not super detrimental, but bad enough to shake me to my core. I didn’t trust myself, or anyone else on the road for that matter. Something that would help me cope with driving is making sure that I stayed focused on my breathing. Your breath is a HUGE thing that is tied in with anxiety/anxiety attacks (at least it is for me). Make sure to keep a steady paced breath, and if you’re feeling very anxious, remember to bring your focus back to your breath. Another thing, is maybe play a relaxing music station (Apple Music, Spotify, Pandora, all have really great stations for this). I know how hard it can be, but there are little changes that you could make might a huge difference over time. Remember- it’s just baby steps, one at a time. Before you know it, you will have gone miles away from where you used to be. -namaste-

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  17. Huge trigger for me… I hate it when the tires sound different when the pavement changes… I start freaking out and think something is wrong with my tires…and of course we know that there is…. So I blast music the whole time.. People hate riding with me.. Works for me though…

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  19. I recently started getting anxiety on the road after having a panic attack while driving (about two weeks ago). Now every time I get in the car I think about it and worry it is going to happen again. I am so glad this post popped up, because we have the exact same issues! Now I carry an Ativan with me whenever I hop in the car, too. I’ve started listening to stand-up comedy while driving and it seems to help divert my attention away from the worries. I also carry a couple of my favorite essential oils with me, because for whatever reason certain scent seems to remind me that I am safe and there is no need to worry. Hopefully we can get past this. Take it easy, and thank you for sharing! It is always nice to know you are not alone 🙂

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    • I really like the of listening to stand up comedy. I really hate the not being able to drive without anxiety. Even today for about fifteen minutes I was a mess. I got through my driving and I was okay outside my car. It’s weird a place that used to bring me solace. Thank you for sharing your story with me.

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  21. My mom, sister, good friend, and I all have various degrees of driving anxiety actually! Mine is only when I’m suddenly encountered with roller coaster looking highway, like a crazy merge situation or on/off ramp. I’m dealing with it by taking herbal anti-anxiety tinctures before driving and also GABA. I just wrote a post about anti-anxiety helpers if you are interested: http://botanicalalchemyandapothecary.com/nervines-and-other-natural-help-for-stress-and-anxiety

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  22. I do not have anxiety at this level, but when I’m in a low spot with depression, I’m often very nervous behind the wheel. Like you said, thinking of all the worst things that could happen. I have no advice, but I am sorry your battle is such a hard one.

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  23. Hi, I know exactly how you’re feeling. I was so excited to pass my test, and was driving around for two years before one day, completely inexplicably, I had a panic attack on the way to work, to the point I couldn’t even drive the last half a mile to get there. Since then, and that was about 5 years ago, I have probably driven 100 miles. Every time I get behind the wheel, I feel like I’m going to have a panic attack, and it’s been so long now since I’ve driven alone I don’t think I’d have the confidence to do it!

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    • That is rough going. I have found lately that I am generally okay when I am driving with a passenger but it’s still a struggle to drive by myself. I have changed my routine before I leave my house. More mindfulness breathing and trying to challenge the thoughts that come into my mind before I leave the house (CBT).

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  25. I didn’t even get my license until I was 25! I too have anxiety as soon as I walk out the front door, and as far back as I can remember. I can’t remember a time I wasn’t anxious. Panic set inif a siren goes off when I am driving. I’m sweating just thinking about it.

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    • That is not a bad idea! I don’t mind looking mad. I think part of the problem is the fear that I could have an uncontrollable panic attack right in the highway and fail to pull over. As long as I have been driving, I have never been in an accident. So it’s a real fear.

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      • Talking to yourself about something going on in your life I find helps best. Even if it’s just how you’re going to cook dinner or something! I don’t have panic attacks but I got it into my head one journey that I might suddenly feel really ill and not be able to pull over. It’s never happened and I’ve never been in an accident either but now I can’t get it out of my head! Xxx

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  28. yeah, i understand. i love the sense of freedom driving can provide, but it’s so scary and gives me terrible anxiety. when i was learning how to drive, i had a terrible instructor that would leave me in tears and shaking after every lesson. she would shout at me and call me names, and afterwards would admit that i did good. i really hope that you will get past this, as you have larger experience than i do (i’ve had my licence for a year). stay safe and keep driving! i wish you best of luck.

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  32. I don’t have anxiety driving, but I have anxiety when other people are driving. I feel like I’m not in control. If I’m driving I know I can leave if I need to (I think that’s called agoraphobia, fear of being stuck?). So sorry you’re going through that! I pray that God heals you and brings you peace. Writing is such a helpful tool.

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  34. Wow! I can completely understand this! It was so great to hear a true example of someone else who has experienced this. I know that when I started to feel like this I tried to find similar examples and other than some self help guides (which never worked), there was never much out there! Most of the people around me don’t understand it and I find i difficult to explain. So thank you! I dont struggle as much as I used to – I would be happy to share my story with you, but just know that it can get better. Thank you so much for sharing!

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      • It is! I am not actually sure where it started and in the very beginning I spent so much time trying to figure it out. It was one of the defining point of anxiety leafing up to me having my first panic attack. This was not directly related however once these monstrous attacks started happening my anxiety around driving got to a monumental high. The profound change came when I accepted a job roughly 50km from where I lived and meant driving on the most dangerous road in Cape Town (I am from South Africa). It forced me to have to do it every day and slowly I have found ways to cope. I am a big believer in development through stress tolerance techniques (because it has been a useful tool for me while coping through my mental disorder). I completely believe that these coping techniques are obviously different for each person but here are some things I have found that helps.
        1. Drive often. Dont avoid it because I have a tendency to overwork myself the longer I delay. Initially I try to ensure I take the same routes because I can remind myself I have done this exact thing before and managed to work through it. Once I am comfortable I try to challenge myself when I am having a good day by changing up my route.
        2. I break down this task that seems monumental into smaller tasks by creating landmarks along the way where I know i can safely stop. It helps because it seems more managable and because as I complete each ‘task’ I feel good because I am achieving these small goals.
        3. If I start feeling myself getting lost I try to distract myself with music I love. I play it loud and sing along if need be and change my focus on my current thought – which is “I am starting to panic” which in effect makes me start to panic. 😐
        4. If the above doesnt work, I use my hands-free and phone a friend. This is pretty much the same reasoning as above but I find this most effective because I actively have to engage with another person.
        5. If all else fails I take my meds and find the closest place I can be safe. I used to hate doing this because I would feel like I failed but I am starting to learn that such is life – I am going to be anxious and not be able to change it.
        Sometimes the above works… sometimes it doesn’t. But I have found the more I have exposed myself to it the less bad days I have had.
        Thanks for listening – I hope you find something in there useful. 🙂

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  35. I used to love driving also, but a few years a go I had a panic attack driving home and have struggled with driving since. My anxiety is much better, but driving is still an issue – I think it’s because I can focus on breathing and calming down in all other situations, but when driving you have to focus all of your attention on the road.

    Thank you for sharing this!

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  36. I’m a bit older than you I guess but I had a nasty car crash when I was 19 so have always been an anxious driver and passenger. I’ve recently been given a cd called Steps to deal with Stress (www.stepsforstress.org) by my counsellor. Now I’m definitely not supposed to listen to it in the car, but just before driving off whilst the car is de-icing and warming up, it’s the absolute best thing in the world! It’s all about breathing and relaxing and works a treat. For me, I’ve just learnt a new life skill and it’s fab! Kx

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  39. I’m sorry you’re dealing with this 😦 I’m afraid to drive, too. I deal with it mainly by taking the bus or a cab. They’re difficult solutions, though, since the bus schedule is kinda limited and cabs can get expensive. I don’t have advice for dealing with driving anxiety, since so far I’ve just been avoiding it, lol, but I feel for you and hope this gets better for you.

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  41. Thank you for posting this:) I am still quite young, but I have anxiety about driving…The only thing is, I haven’t really drove yet, I don’t even have my G1 (beginners). I’ve driven a few short times with my dad while he was teaching me, but not more than a handful of times. It’s not the test I’m worried about, it’s the actual driving. I’m almost 2 years behind with getting my licence, and almost all of my friends have their G2 now. It’s just scary to me that I’d be in control of a vehicle, it’s so dangerous. I need to get my G1 this year though to go to university next year…any advice on this?

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  43. Totally get this. My driving anxiety started in tunnels, then spread to motorways. I have to drive a lot with work now, and this has actually helped. The more I drive a particular route, the more comfortable I feel. I try to see it as a friendly route, with recognisable places along the way. And podcasts help.

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  44. I just posted about driving in the rain. Driving gives me a lot of anxiety. Especially if I have kids in the car. That is why I made sure that I got an SUV that had the curtain air bags.

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  45. I absolutely understand. The hardest thing is getting to/in my car. Once I am on my way and crank some tunes, I am fine.
    It is hard, it really is. But you are strong for recognizing that it is hard, which puts you in a great place to overcome it.

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  46. I have car anxiety as well but I am fearful of a fiery, deadly crash. I’m working on it lol.
    So I came upon your blog when searching for blogs about anxiety. I have had terrible anxiety my whole life. Crippling actually. I recently solved the puzzle and want to help others. What I see when reading this: You said anxiety at least 10 times. You said fear, worst, could, if, panic, DRIVING. The sense I get is fear of judgment. Were you bullied as a child? By anyone? Were you harshly judged? Harshly punished? In your past, what was the “worst that would happen” What happened when you weren’t perfect? In reality, most people would help you if you were having a panic attack in the car. It’s your OWN judgement of yourself. You HAVE to find the true root cause of your fear of judgment and fear of not being perfect. If you want to read how I did it, it’s on my blog.
    God Bless, Elizabeth

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  47. i get car anxiety.. my anxiety is so bad that i never even bothered to try to get my license to drive.. i had repeated nightmares for years that i was going to die in a car accident. been a life long fear… the ONLY time i get anxiety about being in a car is during the winter months and when there is a bad rain storm. i end up having this massive meltdown into crying fits.. i struggle and its real. i feel your pain!

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      • i have a friend that has the worse car anxiety like you she cant even drive anymore.. she always has someone drive for her.. i know tons of times she would get down the road and turn around and come right back. her husband yells at her and tell her to get over it as if its soo easy to do.. i hate that some people dont know a think about anxiety and they think its just so easy to get over it.. that annoys me. as if we have some switch to turn off

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      • i dont like it when they tell me its all in my head. and that i am over reacting and how i am being a negative nancy. but of course they are people that dosnt suffer so they have no idea how bad it really is.. i know with mine i get physically sick.. body twitching.. i had a constant eye twitch for a good 3 years before it decided to go away.

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      • i just read that one you wrote.. my one anxiety is health anxiety. i always think something is wrong with me that is my main one.. everytime i get a new pain i think the worse case possible. you know i started taking CBD “hemp” oil drops to help with anxiety and i gotta say.. it really does lessen the anxiety if not take it away most times.. maybe you should look into it i dont know if i have social anxiety.. i know i avoid big crowds at all cost.. like if i have to go to walmart to buy food. im not very long. i feel very sufficated

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